Dating in 2022

Dating in a city is incredibly difficult. Dating in a city in 2022 is incredibly difficult. How is it possible to navigate through all of the emotions running rampant throughout the streets? The overanalyzing and guessing is almost detrimental to your mental health. But who cares, you’re getting laid, right? 

But I don’t want to just get laid. I especially don’t want to get laid by a man who thinks my clit is on his penis. 

I want passion. I want a connection. I want love. 

I think everyone wants those things. 

But it’s almost not in style anymore. Falling in love is soooo early 2000’s. It’s all about hooking up on the first date and trauma bonding. We both hate our dads? Makes sense, your place or mine?

I don’t think I’m built for that. I’m built for reading poems by candlelight. I’m built for singing my favorite song while sharing my favorite tea. I’m built for telling my darkest secrets to a complete stranger. 

But in modern dating, I’m an oversharer. I’m a walking red flag. As Lorde says, I’m a liability. 

Are they wrong or am I? Am I romanticizing “toxicity” or are they romanticizing porn culture? Who is right? Or are we both right and I just need to find someone who thinks like me? Or am I in need of a change of behavior, of mindset? 

How am I supposed to know the answer?

And when you start “dating” someone, it’s a whole other game. 

Do I text first or do they?

Should I order another drink or is that too much?

Don’t finish your whole plate of food because they haven’t.

How do I say no to sex?

Can I say no to sex?

Will I say no to sex?

Will this be another one night stand?

I don’t want another one night stand.

I don’t really have a choice though.

Because I don’t know their intentions.

And I can’t ask for their intentions. That would be too forward. 

And you can’t be too forward. 

You’ll scare them away.

Was I just too forward?

I shouldn’t have baked him a cake.

Baking a cake is a relationship action.

But he did make me dinner and we did agree we would do this.

But did we agree we would do this?

Or did he tell me?

Does he think I’m attractive?

Did I wear too much makeup?

I don’t want to come off as high maintenance. 

Do I smell okay?

He said I taste good. I don’t remember asking. 

Oh, he’s leaving.

Will he text me for another date?

Do I even want another date? 

Let him chase you.
Mantras, mantras, mantras.

Let them come to you.

You have to be independent!

But don’t make more than him.

And don’t be more skilled than him. 

How much money does he make?

Can he take care of me?

Do I want him to take care of me?

No, I have to be independent. 

I don’t need a relationship.

I’m using him as much as he’s using me. 

Right? 

Right?

No, I deserve better. 

I am better. 

He’s out of my league.

What the fuck is a league? 

Who's on mine?

Let’s give him a chance. 

I need to get laid anyway.

But I’m not even cumming. 

And he didn’t even try. 

What was the point of this?

Did I even benefit from this?

Does he?

Have I done enough therapy to date?

Am I projecting?

Am I gaslighting?

Am I trying too hard?

His problems are not my problems.

He needs to go the therapy.

I’m not his mom.

But it’s not his fault.

Does he want love?

He deserves love.

I deserve love, too. 

I deserve love.

I deserve love, too.